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#30DaysOfPoetry #NovemberPoetryChallenge (Part 1/5)

November 7, 2018

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#30DaysOfPoetry #NovemberPoetryChallenge (Part 1/5)

November 7, 2018

For the month of November, I will be keeping a “poem diary” of sorts for my own personal #30DaysOfPoetry #NovemberPoetryChallenge. I will be publishing all pieces in short installments via this blog. Maybe it's good, maybe it's not, but I guess I'll never know if I don't put it out there. 

 

Poetry is significantly more personal to me than songwriting and it shows when I write. I have an emotionally challenging month ahead so I figured I should make good use of it in more ways than one.

 

NOVEMBER 1ST

"Spectrum"

 

There's a tornado inside my head

I lose my ground in shades of red

But rose colored glasses destroy and delay

The inevitable storm of guilt and shame

 

I must acknowledge the rainbow

Light up the truth with a flash of yellow

Victory in hints of green

As I convince myself to intervene

 

It's okay to feel the blues

The lightest and boldest emotional hues

The purple floods my soul tonight

As the anger and sadness join to unite

 

But I won't run away

I'll allow myself to feel

I can't separate

From the things that are real

I won't dissociate

And I won't let them down

I promised I would change

And I'm proving it now

 

And suddenly, I see the bigger picture

As the prisms in my blood

Decipher all the colors

And process the pressure

That's eating at my eyes

And slamming through my skull

Coercing me to hide

Begging me to explode

But I won't

 

I will fight through the pain

And battle through the madness

As the rainbow cackles in my direction

But after years you've witnessed go to waste

You learn the battles you must not chase

 

I would rather shut it down

With a manifested curse

So here's to my spectrum

For better or for worse

 

NOVEMBER 2ND

"Life's A Bitch"

Life's a bitch

We can't deny it

It sucks

I could scream, I could cry

Get on the ground and lie about it

Or I could be a mother fucking dare devil

Rise above and get riled up about it

Be the badass I see on Pinterest

Move forward through the sludge

No time to regress

When you're focused on winning

And sprinting ahead

 

So here's to the battles

And the weights I bear

No choice but to shred

What I'm not willing to share

I'm a beautiful mess

No perfection to show

But fake love is overrated

When your heart can't find a home

Within your own bones

 

So today, I challenge my insecurities

Call the bluff on my impurities 

It won't happen overnight

And maybe not next year

But I will not fail, not again

I'll scream 'til I'm red in the face

For the whole fucking world to hear

I refuse to disappear

Into my own turmoil created by my brain

I've worked too hard to hang on to being sane

So hear me roar, my heart will reign

As I love myself through the sunshine

and the darkness

And the wind and the droplets

And the silence and the earthquake 

Prepare to shake in disbelief